“Coming Out Day is rooted in the 1987 March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights with its AIDS Quilt display. That event is widely regarded as pivotal for the gay community, bringing together and politicizing lesbian and gay men and turning the tide on treatment for people living with HIV and AIDS. Rob Eichberg and Jean O Leary, two well-known gay rights activists, founded Coming Out Day on the first anniversary of the march, October 11, 1988, to encourage lesbians and gay men to reveal their sexual orientation to family, friends and co-workers.” [source]
There has been so much change in the world since 1988. I first came out in 1995. I can remember telling a friend of mine that I did not believe we would see marriage equality within our lifetimes. Thankfully, I was wrong. We are seeing a growing support of equality within state laws. It is no longer a question of if marriage equality will happen, but when.
Coming Out Always
There have been several closets I’ve emerged from: bisexual, lesbian, queer, pagan, poly, transgender. As I grow in my self knowledge, my identity has evolved. I am one of the lucky individuals that have parents who have always taken my coming out with grace and integrity. I won’t even begin to imagine what it is to come out with out this kind of support.
Not all coming out stories are quite as transitional as my own, but the reality is that no one comes out just once. As we move through life we meet new people, enter new situations and gain new opportunities in which we have the ability to introduce our truths. It can be tiring to constantly break down the hetero-normative assumption, but the importance of living a life of honesty and integrity is nevertheless always important.
Come out as an ally
But this brings me to an oft forgotten closet that needs to be kicked down. Coming out as an ally! This is such an important role. Having someone to listen, love and allow you the space to just be you is perhaps the greatest gift you can give a person. We all need to have this kind of safe space.
So today, on National Coming Out Day, consider how you can come out today? Consider too, how your coming out may help someone else. Consider how your coming out may save someone’s life.
Happy National Coming Out Day!
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